The story behind Choosing to See Beauty: I have been writing this book for several years. During those years, the layout has changed several times, and it wasn’t until I met a Catholic doctor who greatly helped me heal that I decided upon the manuscript that will be published this winter. One afternoon, after a particularly challenging session of therapy, he told me the following, which in turn inspired me to write my final manuscript.
Seek beauty in all things. To embrace love, you must see what is beautiful. Watching you struggle today and succeed was a great thing of beauty for me to behold. Your precious journal is and remains beautiful. It has in it your deepest thoughts and feelings, dried tears, smudges, corrections, sketches and the like – verses and paintings of love and pain. This is life. Never throw out your memories but instead turn the ugly ones back into what God intended them to be. Only when you need to purge, write or draw things on pieces of scrap paper that you can burn immediately. However, even then, as you watch the billowing smoke rise, ask God to receive what is painful and to supply you with what is beautiful and peaceful. You will never be able to replace and exchange yourself, your body, your experiences or memories for anything else. God made you and will make every thing that you and others do into something good and beautiful. Keep your book, treasure it and envision its old and tattered state over time – a personal guide of your journey and your personal attempt to turn all things that He has given to you into a treasure. Let God turn things to dust as He will do with all things (and from which He created all things). God is God and we are not.
Choosing to see Beauty is the story of how I came to call God, Father and see myself as His daughter. In it I write about my recovery from an eating disorder, abuse, depression, chronic post traumatic stress disorder, 2 years of trauma therapy, a Catholic doctor who changed my outlook on suffering, a loved one’s addiction to pornography, my time as a student-athlete, my time as a missionary, a summer in Kolkata, India serving with the Missionaries of Charity and most importantly the love of the Father.
Choosing to See Beauty will be published this winter, check back soon for updates and a cover design.