On inside look at my journal from trauma therapy

Someone paid MIHI a beautiful compliment today. Your blog ‘I Fight Him With Love’ is the most beautiful blog for inspiration and anecdotes about being a truly beautiful woman.

Thank you so much, that was so sweet and kind!

Recently, Made in His Image has received a lot of emails in regards to therapy. Each week when I was in therapy, my doctor had me write a list of positive things from the week, as part of my homework. And I thought it would be a really great excercise for you too. Instead of focusing on the negative, how much it hurts, or how far you need to go: focus on the positive, what you are grateful for and write down your progress along your journey of healing.

The positive points below are taken from my journey and I would like you to read them and then come up with your own positive points each week and keep them in a journal. YOU CAN DO IT! Let me know how you do!

1. I looked at myself in the mirror and said aloud, “I’m a daughter of God, created in His image and likeness. I am beautiful because my dignity flows from Him. He doesn’t create ugly.”

2. A guy at work put his hand on my shoulder. It made me feel really uncomfortable, but I tried not to overreact and just to relax.

3. Tried to be more assertive at work. I did this by not asking what people thought, but instead was confident in my ability as a baker.

4. I didn’t lock my bedroom door this week.

5. I went running during the day light and tried not to let people staring at me bother me, or the guys that whistled at me. Man, I hate when they do that, it’s so annoying.

6. I went swimming and wore a bathing suit

7. I wore a sleeveless shirt without feeling self-conscious.

8. I saw my reflection in a window and saw God’s beauty, instead of the ugliness I have usually seen.

9. I decided after three years of being a slave to the effects of Charlie’s addiction to pornography that I wasn’t going to let it have a hold on me anymore. His addiction wasn’t my fault and I am beautiful.

10. I thought about how far I’ve come from college and thanked God for my progress.

11. I remember in college it was hard for me to wear shorts or short sleeves because I was so self-conscious. And I never wore my hair down because I knew some people would find it attractive, and I didn’t want anyone looking at me. But I did all of those things this week and it felt so good.

12. One night during the week I woke up from a bad dream and thought I heard somebody in my room. I got up and looked around my room and told myself that it was just a dream. And I didn’t even lock my door; I was proud of myself.

13. I tried really hard to look directly into someone’s eyes when I shook their hand. I also gave them a firm handshake.

14. One of the guys at work saw me lifting the 50 pound bag of flour and he offered to help me. My naturally inclination was to say, “I got it.” But, I thought about what Dr. Bellet said about letting people, especially men help me so I said, “thank you that would be great.”

15. I’m getting more use to physical touch, one of the girls at work gave me a really tight hug and it actually felt good.

16. I let my roommate braid my hair because I had accidentally sliced my finger at work and couldn’t braid my hair. It didn’t hurt, it actually felt good to let someone help me.

17. I chose to continue to choose forgiveness.

If you settle for anything less than the greatness that has been made possible for you, you are ignoring the twitch of the Divine weaver on the thread of your life. Let His grace lift you to where in your heart of hearts you want to be. ~George Weigel


2 thoughts on “On inside look at my journal from trauma therapy

  1. Wow Maura, I love how you were able to keep a journal of your progressions out of the dark days you used to suffer through. What a wonderful thing it is to be able to look back on the things we progress in, just as we can look back to the Bible and look how God’s children progressed from pain to joy. You ARE truly a daughter of God Maura!!! You are so very beautiful, but what makes you the most attractive (to me) is your inclination to always give. It is almost like my heart hurts from joyful pain (like a muscle when you work it out really well), because it is so great to see how thoughtful and kind you always are. You are going to make the best wife a man could EVER ask for, Maura. I wish there were so many more like you!!!

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